First Visit

Most parents go to the hospital to meet their daughter. Not us, we went to the Pottery Patch and painted plates with her! October 4, 2012 is a day that will live in infamy for our family. It was the day we met our daughter. The days leading up to the visit were anxious for us, but the nerves weren't as intense as we thought. There was an interesting sense of peace that surrounded it all. But the butterflies grew more intense as the hours ticked closer to 4:30 pm on Thursday afternoon.

We decided to meet at 4:00 at the Pottery Patch in Valrico 30 minutes before the scheduled visit. We took a few minutes to pray together and ask God to bless this special meeting. Mallory had gone to Wal-Mart before to pick up two journals. The stationary aisle at Wal-Mart was filled with journals, and it was a bit overwhelming trying to pick something that she would like. A quick prayer went out, "Lord, help me to pick her favorite color. " Mallory grabbed two similar looking blue journals, a packets of brightly colored pens, and cute pencil bag.

Journaling was idea we thought would help us open up a dialogue with her if she didn't feel comfortable initially communicating her feelings verbally.  She would have a journal and we would have a journal. In between every visit, all three of us would write notes, thoughts, feelings, and questions in the journal for each other to read. At each visit, we will swap journals, read each other's notes, and write back.

The Pottery Patch was almost empty when we walked in. We picked out some small, square dessert places and stencils with our initials. We thought we could each decorate a plate with the first letter of our first name on the plate. We got a our table set up and began to wait. Thankfully, we didn't have to wait long. They came walking up T. and her case worker. We walked out the door to greet them. T. had a bright smile and was very friendly. "Nice to meet you" we all said to each other as we walked back into the store. Mallory explained that we had picked out some plates to decorate with our first initials. We quickly headed to the back to pick out our colors of paint. "What's your favorite color?" we asked. "Blue. My favorite color is blue," as she quickly pulled a bright blue off the shelf. Yes!!!! God answered Mallory's prayer. Blue journals were going to be perfect.

We spent the first 30 minutes of the visit painting and chatting. She was not shy as she started painting. T. just wanted to experiment and make her own plate. We talked about school, favorite foods, friends, and what we all like to do for fun. Her case worker had primed us that she may have questions for us during the visit. We graciously tried to open the door to her questions at least three different times. Each time, she said, "no, I don't have anything to ask." The overwhelming nature of the visit may have made her a little shy to ask what was floating around in her mind. We asked her what she thought about our family book, and her only comment was, "you have a big family!"

We told her that we had a gift for her. Her eyes lit up! "You do?" she asked. "Yes," Mallory said. "It's just something little." She seemed happy as she opened the blue journal and pens. We explained that we both have a journal that we can use to write back and forth to each other to ask questions and write notes. We had already wrote our firs note to T. in her journal to get it started. She started to open it up to read, but then, stopped and decided to wait until later.

As we finished up our painting session, we made a plan to ride down the road to Chick-Fil-A and have a pre-dinner milkshake! Big smile came over her face. She ordered a large cookies and cream milkshake and devoured every bit of it. We talked about what we'd like to do for our next visit. We settled on the park, so we could bring Sophie for her to meet. That seemed to make her day. She had questions about Sophie. Does she sleep with you? Do she shed? How big is she? She seemed pleased with all of our answers. Mallory had over pick out her favorite after school snack: blue gatorade and purple and green grapes. The date was set for Monday at 3:45 pm. Sophie is excited to meet her new sister.

As we walked out the door, it was pouring rain. As we walked to the door, you could see the wheels turning in her head as to how she will say good bye. She held the first door for us that led into the entry way and then she darted out the second door into the rain and began running to her case worker's car. She quickly turned around and waved, "bye, I'll see you later," with a big smile.

That was it. Our visit wasn't too long, but just long enough to fall in love with her. The next weeks and months we will begin the process of T. becoming used to us and feeling comfortable with who we are. Just imagine the thoughts going through her mind. As an 11 year old, you are meeting your forever family for the very first time. That's unreal to think.

We thank everyone for their prayers and continue to covet them as we continue down this road to family life.